Tough Love

Misguided sympathy is dangerous because:

a) it enables someone to feel sorry for themselves, yet take no action to change things

b) it digs the hole deeper, so they've less chance of getting out of it

c) it creates a 'learned helplessness' guaranteeing they'll feel even more hopeless.

Sometimes tough love is what's needed. Although Jesus had compassion for hurting people, He never merely felt sorry for them. Whenever possible He helped them to help themselves. Before He worked on their behalf, He often asked them to do something. And sometimes His instructions seemed radical.

For example, "Arise, take up your bed, and go… "' (Matthew 9:6 NKJV). '"Your daughter is dead."… Jesus… said to the ruler of the synagogue, "Do not be afraid; only believe."' (Mark 5:35-36 NKJV). 'He spat on the ground and made clay… He anointed the eyes of the blind man with the clay… He said… "Go, wash in the pool of Siloam" So he went… and came back seeing' (John 9:1-7NKJV). How could a crippled man rise, take up his bed and walk? How could a man who had just received the report of his daughter's death be expected to stay calm? How could a blind man even see to get to a certain pool of water?

Instead of merely feeling sorry for people, Jesus moved them to action. He helped them to get their minds off their problems, and motivated them to do something about them. At times we feel like we're being unkind if we confront people who have problems, when in reality 'tough love' is what they need.

Be Blessed.